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Reverse Brainwashing: The Goal of Rebuilding March 3, 2019 – Posted in: News

If you have been a participant at any of my speaking events, you know that three years ago today I removed myself and my child from a dangerous situation and unhealthy marriage. Many people (including family and friends) did not know the severity of the situation and how it had progressed over a decade. I was once a happy, smiley, outgoing and talkative woman with a bubbly personality and many friends. I could talk to anyone, anywhere, about anything, and we would laugh as if we knew each other for years. After the ending of a long-term, seven-year relationship, I was feeling lonely and bored and decided to try online dating. It would be the last time I take that route. It was love at first sight and quite the chemistry between us. I was in awe of his charm, charisma and good looks. However, each month, a truth about… Read More

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What’s In a Name?: Choosing Your Words Wisely September 21, 2018 – Posted in: News

Even when teased as a child, some of us would chant “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” However, as an adult, I don’t find that true at all. I was bullied and teased all through school and I was never able to follow my parent’s advice and let it ‘roll off my back’ and not ‘wear my heart on my sleeve’. Is it because I was born ‘too sensitive’, as the perpetrators like to conclude, or is it something deeper than that? Perhaps words really do hurt. Consider this…if a person hears something over and over again about themselves, does it eventually become true to them. They say Repetition is the key to learning, right? And is this true for both positive and negative statements? I tend to believe it is. My parents told me my whole childhood and adult life that I… Read More

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Living With Chronic Pain: How I Got My Life Back August 27, 2018 – Posted in: News

  During one of the most stressful years of my life, while I was battling complications from Type II Diabetes, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Before I had visited the Rheumatologist, I thought it was just joint ailments and a touch of arthritis, since I was entering my 40’s and thought it was to be expected. However, when the pain of violent electric shocks began to affect every part of my body, I sought the help of a professional. It was becoming a debilitating condition that was affecting my personal and professional life. For several years after I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, I had been prescribed the following: Gabapentin Cmybalta Piroxicam Lyrica Tramadol Baclofen Steroid shots in the neck and shoulder area And at one point, I was on 3, 4, 5, 6 and 7 at the same time. The pain was still present and the side affects of the… Read More

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How I Was Taught NOT to Care About ‘Self-Care’ August 15, 2018 – Posted in: News

by Cheryl Denise Bannerman My brothers had just busted my bedroom’s glass closet doors and put three holes in the hallway walls. Their drug-induced fight started in my bedroom, continued down the hallway, and out the front door to the street in front of our house…until the police arrived. I wondered how my parents endured all these years. Oh yeah, through me. The Savior. Making up for my brother’s disappointing lives, I had to be perfect in everything. I was the perfect Honor Roll student, excelling at everything from track and field to writing award-winning poetry, to hitting the high notes during ‘family performances’. I had retreated to my bedroom with my hands shaking and nose running from crying, when my dad knocked on the door and said Sunday breakfast was ready. I tried to sit at the table like nothing was wrong, but the tears continued to roll down… Read More

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Domestic Violence: The Ultimate Paradox October 13, 2016 – Posted in: News

Your home should be a place of safety. Yet, in a month devoted to highlighting the pain and feelings of shame caused by domestic violence, for some it is the place of greatest danger. Each time the door closes, when the light goes out, when no one else is around to see – the person we once loved, still love, acts out physical, emotional and psychological violence in the place where we should fear no-one – never mind our most intimate partner. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, nearly 20 people per minute are abused by an intimate partner in the US. This is 10 million women and men. Despite common misconceptions, not all abuse victims are women. A quarter of all men have been victims of some form of violence from a partner in their lifetime and it is a third of all women. Domestic violence does… Read More

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The importance of self-compassion October 12, 2016 – Posted in: News

If you have ever had a period of clinical depression, or if you have struggled throughout your life with chronic depression, you know that this is more than just a period of sadness. Depression is well named. It pushes down on a person, it makes the world full of shadows and it sucks energy and hope from the world. There is no point asking a person with depression to just go out and improve their self-esteem. It is like asking a blind man to just go see for a change. If it was as easy as being told to like yourself more, people with depression would love to have gone and done that months, years, decades ago. Having a personal mantra of “You are a good person and you are worth it” is likely to torment a person with depression more than it offers them comfort. So, if the answer… Read More

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